Reacting to Blue Ivy
Lorde looks like an alien who is desperately trying to replicate human emotion so her cover isn’t blown.
men: rape jokes hahaha! beating women haha! lol make me a sandwich whore! put on makeup fugly! hahaha!
women: those aren’t funny.
men: lighten up, it’s a joke wow must be on her period women are so emotional lol
women: i drink the tears of men, haha!
men: hOW DARE YOU. HOW DARE YOU PROMOTE THE SUFFERING OF US MEN? DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE HAVE DONE FOR YOU? YOU WOULD BE NOTHING WITHOUT US. THATS NOT FUNNY AT ALL
*puts on sexy underwear but accepts the fact that no one will see it*
But knowing daddy bought them is good enough for me.
flies to 3 different countries in 3 mins
This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.
You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.
ya i eat ass
Amazingly, not The Onion:
“[W]e now have young men telling Bloomberg News that they basically view their female peers as rape bombs just waiting to explode and ruin their lives.”
I REPEAT: THIS IS NOT THE ONION
Last night I found the "Fursona Generator" thanks to some Tumblr friends. I clicked through a few times and was laughing with tears streaming down my face.
My sense of humor is a bit warped.
Here are a few of the ones I got right away. Just super quick sketches— I needed to do something fun. I need to go back and hit it again for more inspiration later on.
me as hell
An artist created what appears to be a high-definition photograph of a dog getting a bath, but it’s actually made of 221,184 cake sprinkles.